Are you a quitter? Do you always set a grand and exciting goal only to give up after a temporary defeat or two? I’m like that for such a long time, and to be honest, I don’t feel so good about it.
It is sometimes more convenient to give up easily on our goals once you see that it is not giving you the results you wanted or wished.
It alarms us when we notice the pattern where we repeatedly jump from one goal to another. Because of what is frequently happening, we start asking ourselves if we are the type of person who can’t stick to his/her goals. This type of thinking makes us doubt ourselves and our ability to pursue something. Or, at times, it ruins our confidence and expects failure before we even start a new adventure.
I’m here to give you some realization about why we sometimes give up on our goals, hoping that this will help you do something about it.
We let fear stop us
Fear is complicated. Fear can destroy our dreams and plans by stopping us from taking action. But on the other hand, fear prompts us to be prepared and alert for possible things that can sabotage our plans. For the majority, fear is a factor in why they give up easily on their goals.
It is our instinct to seek comfort, so it is expected that being challenged by your goals can push someone on the verge of giving up. Fear can take the form of different things or situations. A person may fear that his/her skills are not enough to achieve the goal, a person may be afraid of failure or success, or he/she is not ready to give up his/her comfort zone.
There are ways to deal with fear. That is, you should learn to break away from the expectation of your past mistake- I discuss this in this blog post. You can deal with fear by preparing yourself and what you might need to achieve what you want. To overcome fear, we should be clear about why and what it is we are fearing.
Once you’ve understood what it is you’re fearing, you’ll find it easy to overcome it if you watch out for your mindset, actions, and expectations.
We give up easily because we don’t want it bad enough
For my first blog post, I talked about why we are not taking action toward our dreams. And in that blog post, I mentioned that deceiving ourselves stops us from taking action. Sometimes we give up easily on our goals because it is not really what we want in the first place.
It happens whenever you allow other people to take away your personal power or allow other people to decide for your life. We sometimes feel that their influence is our reality. Only to end up realizing that we are just wasting our time chasing something that’s not going to make our hearts happy.
The thing is, you’ll need to live a satisfying life. A life with a purpose or definite goal is vital to help you feel satisfied with life. Pursuing something you want and living your purpose will guarantee that you’ll never want to throw in the towel or give up.
When you find that goal you want so bad, you’ll realize that you are willing to give your all to succeed at it. It is exciting, and it will change your life as it did to mine.
We give up easily because of a lack of self-compassion
We find it hard to stick to our goals because of our unrealistic expectations of ourselves.
Have you ever realized how tough you are toward yourself? Do you find yourself belittling your small wins or accomplishment? You might be a good person toward other people, but any goal will be tough to accomplish if you do not exercise self-love.
We need to understand that we should watch how we talk to ourselves because negative self-talk will not bring us any good results. You’ll end up believing what you keep telling yourself. Imagine feeling that you are worthless because you repeatedly say it to yourself? It will not do you good.
To not give up easily, we should learn to practice loving ourselves genuinely. In the end, we are going to live with ourselves and our thoughts, so why not practice some compassion like how you’d be with your dear friend.
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We give up easily on our dreams because we compare ourselves to others
Comparing ourselves to someone else is a double-edged sword. It can make us feel inspired and motivated by seeing how other people achieve what we want. On the other hand, comparing ourselves to someone else may end up sabotaging us.
Seeing other people’s progress and comparing ourselves may make us feel bad, especially if we do not see good results from our efforts. We are ruined by the success of others on the surface, but we failed to see the hard work someone puts through to achieve what they have now.
Do not let other people’s success make you give up easily on your goals. Stop comparing their point 10 to your point 1. Just let them be and mind your own thing. Doing this will keep you peaceful, more focused, and less distracted in achieving your goals.
We are not finding ways to make things easy
Making things easy to do is something I learned from reading Atomic Habit, a life-changing book. Although James Clear is talking about habits, I believe it can apply to someone working toward a goal.
We know for sure that a big goal can be overwhelming, and without proper planning, we will quit early on in the journey. It doesn’t have to be this way because we can make our goals easier to work on by breaking them into mini-goals.
If you only look at how complicated and challenging your goals are, you’ll most likely lose your confidence before you even take a step further. The trick is to break down your goals into tasks that will ensure that you’ll move closer and closer to achieve your ultimate results.
Final thoughts about giving up easily
I wrote this because I want you to know that it is never too late to start something new. It seems ironic that I’m talking about starting over when this post is all about why we give up easily. But I want to encourage you not to tie your future to your past mistakes.
I also made mistakes in the past, and I judged myself for how easily I give up on things I thought I wanted. It takes a lot of courage to reframe my self-beliefs. Those limiting beliefs also prevent me from starting a blog. Because I sometimes think that, what if it happens again? What if I quit again?
But you know what? When you find your purpose, I’ll guarantee that everything in your life will change for the better. And you’ll never want to or even entertain the thought of giving up. Find your purpose and do your best to attain it.
Love and light,
Arti says
I have felt that I keep comparing myself to other and that might be the reason of me leaving few goals in past. Not anymore. Thanks for reminding again 😊
Abby says
Hi! I honestly have the same problem. But I learned how to appreciate myself and what capabilities I have. Thanks for reading 🙂
Patrice says
Thank you so much for this blog post! It literally spoke to me, as fear being my biggest culprit. I was standing in my own way in regards to my dreams. Thank you for writing!
Abby says
Thanks for reading! Yes fear is powerful in a way that it can talk us out of pursuing our goals.
Isabel Talens says
Abigail, absolutely spot on! A subject worthwhile writing about!
Abby says
No problem, Isabel! Glad that you love this!